Stuff You Need to Know (Slight Update)

Q: Are you guys mean?
A: Absolutely! It’s what we do. But we don’t mean to be mean to you, Constant Reader. We like you. Really! So don’t say stupid shit in the comments and we won’t have to slam you.

Q: Why the hell do you do this crap?
A: Hollywood ALL MEDIA needs to be made fun of. A lot. We’re just the assholes to do it.

Q: Are there any movies you actually like?
A: Yes. Next?

Q: What the hell is ‘hyperbole’?
A: hyperbole [hy‐per‐bŏli], exaggeration for the sake of emphasis in a figure of speech not meant literally. An everyday example is the complaint ‘I’ve been waiting here for ages.’ Hyperbolic expressions are common in the inflated style of dramatic speech known as bombast, as in Shakespeare’s Antony and Cleopatra when Cleopatra praises the dead Antony:

His legs bestrid the ocean: his reared arm
Crested the world.

Q: Sometimes, you people seem to contradict yourselves. Have you noticed this?
A: Yes. No. Shutup.

Q: Where are those quotes at the top of the site from?
A: Here you go:

“You know these are the limits of your life, man. The rule of your little fuckin’ gate here. Here’s your four dollars, you pathetic piece of shit. “
Carl Showalter, Fargo (1996)

“I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.”
Ripley, Aliens (1986)

“I told those fucks down at the league office a thousand times that I don’t roll on Shabbos!”
Walter Sobchak, The Big Lebowski (1998)

“You’ve waited twenty years for me, Lu. What’s another twenty seconds?”
John Constantine, Constantine (2005)

“We really shook the pillars of heaven, didn’t we, Wang?”
Jack Burton, Big Trouble in Little China (1986)

“The next thing you know, there’s money missing off the dresser, and your daughter’s knocked up. I seen it a hundred times.”
Tommy Calahan, Jr., Tommy Boy (1995)

“I know you gentlemen have been through a lot, but when you find the time, I’d rather not spend the rest of this winter TIED TO THIS FUCKING COUCH!”
Garry, John Carpenter’s The Thing (1982)

“Look, Chalmers, let’s understand each other… I don’t like you.”
Frank Bullitt, Bullitt (1968)

“Look, Sammy, I’m not a very good shot … but the Samaritan here uses really big bullets.”
Hellboy, Hellboy (2004)

More to follow…